Budget Build

With the winter coming, I had to breathe some new life into my hardtail Stumpjumper. I sold it, bought a Niner EMD and a few extras...I thought that I would post up some photos of the new "Budget Build" for you guys to check out while you're spinning on your trainers and browsing the interwebs....

Tis the Season

Not sure how your holiday seasons are turning out, but mine is kind of a bummer. I miss biking. All this gift shopping, dealing with crowded malls, obnoxious people, horrible holiday music, and fruit cake makes me want to trade places with the Santa we see below. He sure has the right idea.

Detroit Invitational Cyclocross

(The above image -- which is frickin' awesome -- is by Ducky Detroit.)

Driving in this morning to the Detroit Invitational Cyclocross Race, I passed Chrysler's Mound Road Plant and had a sort of Pavlovian averse reaction. In college, I worked for a company that manufactured aluminum intake manifolds, and spent most of my work days at Chrysler's Trenton Engine Plant. But every once in awhile I'd get called in to this or that random plant at 2 a.m. to sort parts all night. Mound Road was one of them. I was happy to pass it en route to a bike race this morning, pretty much right across the street.

Dorias / Dorais Park is on the corner of Mound Rd. and Outer Drive on Detroit's east side. At the southeastern part of the park is an old concrete velodrome, recalling a time when track bicycle racing was the absolute biggest sport in America (pre-dating the 1969 Dorais Park track, of course, but go with me here). Track racing was once bigger than baseball. Bigger than boxing (which defined epic back in the day). The original Madison Square Garden, in fact, was initially built for bike races.

Today's festivities would be hosted by the RACING GREYHOUNDS. The 10 a.m. race was apparently the last race of their internal series for the year; the 11:30 invitational would prove to be a largely goofball throwdown between the rest of us.

A few warmup laps upon arrival revealed that on this course there could be nothing so petty as warming up. Steep hills; cambered hairpin corners; obscene, knee-deep mud you could only properly describe as "Belgian"; a set of obstacles that made you duck in the middle; a pile of snow; and a tour of the aforementioned velodrome. . . . This, boys and girls, was nothing short of an object lesson in suffering happily.

The RACING GREYHOUNDS did their final proper race of the year under 55 degree skies, strung out along the course at the end like so many hopes and dreams, the guys in front racing their hearts out, and the guys in back -- where I'd soon be in the next race -- just kind of enjoying a morning of hard riding with friends.

We queued up for the invitational race at the top of the hill, all jokes and the anticipation of pain. Flew down the hill together, maybe 40 of us, toward and around the velodrome. I'm feeling good, mid-pack where I seem happiest so far in my short career. Back up the hill to the "Tequila Shot Shortcut," which is the option of a tequila shot in lieu of a hundred-yard death march down and back up a soggy, slow-ass hill. I fly by (or maybe I crawled) as nearly everyone else lines up at the shortcut; I'm thinking "shit, maybe I shouldn't wait until my last lap or two to take a shot." Sure enough, "mid-pack" becomes "way-the-f@@k-at-the-back" as almost the whole, now-solidly-on-the-way-to-drunk peloton screams down the back into the mud while I, with a couple other suckers, struggle up the Sucker Hill.

The next two laps are this: I pass the same few people down by the velodrome over and over again as they pass me up on the hill with shots. Meanwhile, the real race is happening always somewhere else on the course where skinny tubular 'cross tires have been inflated to meet, in just such a way, today's race conditions. I have no idea where that is. I'm just happy to not have Jason McBride breathing down my neck (see my previous post, Stomach of Anger, Lansing), which is to say, I'm not quite ever near death today. But I'm still riding pretty hard. And every once in awhile, I even sight, like a yeti, that guy dressed as Bob Marley, drinking at least as much as he's riding, even as he hammers with distinction -- if not dignity -- through his second race of the morning.

The whole 45 minutes are a muddy, soaked blur of beer bacon donut dollar playing-card hand-ups (oh yeah, we're also playing poker), snowmound bunnyhops, obstacle walks-not-runs, and run-ins with the ghosts of the old velodrome. My claim to fame was making it up, three times, the steep-ass backside hill behind the tequila debauchery (which is also to say that I walked it four or five times. I lost track of the laps). By the end of the race, my bike was so bogged down in mud that it refused to shift properly. DNFs started littering the course en masse somewhere around the third lap.

I started taking tequila shots on lap four and realized, to my chagrin, that by "shots" they meant more like "half shots." Shit, man! By then it had become clear that if you want to be competitive in the RACING GREYHOUNDS Detroit Invitational, you have to basically throw back some sauce on every lap (and if you're toward the back on the last lap, also apparently just kind of use the course as a guideline at that point). I'll definitely be back next year with more proper race tactics (which isn't to outright admit that I might also carry my own playing cards).

Afterward, a bunch of people from the race headed over to Kuhnhenn Brewery, some just to scream at the U of M / Ohio State football game. Awesome beer, good pizza, and for me, time spent as well with a couple of my best friends.

All in all, a great party of a race. A wonderful event put on by a pretty crazy group of local bike racers. And to that sadistic CX Czar, Jeff: that course took a few years off of untold lives today. Not cool, dude. You and I are emphatically not cool. (PS I'll see you there next year! & in all seriousness, thanks for an epic day. It was basically a perfect distillation of every reason to ride bikes in the first place.)

Chains!

So as some of you know all to well I have a small compulsion with disposal and use of old chains. Since my retirement from competitive cycling it has given me time to think and contemplate things. I can now admit that I might have a slight problem. I might need help, maybe seek some consoluing, or find some new chain source (something for $4.99 or less). I think I just have issues with throwing things away. I don't think that it is an extreme case of hording but none the less I just can't part with all of my chains.

Here are some chains, who knows how long I have had them. I do believe that they are still useable and have many rides left in them. I used to use a zip lock bag system. Each chain had the gear ratio they worked with labeled on them. They weren't easy to store and things got kind of screwed up when I didn't update the bag. Multiple chains got placed in one bag, things were dirty, I just didn't like the system. Lately I have gone to storing them in old chain boxes. If wrapped real neatly you can stack them nicely. The system keeps the dirt and grime to a minimum and I have been somewhat good with updating the boxes.

These two chains are much older. I hadn't developed my elaborate chain storage system yet. But yet again they can be mounted on a bike and one day be ridden and fixed by Jared.


I also like to make chains out of chains. Below are some chain pieces that are just waiting to be added into an existing chain to become a new chain, a longer chain, a better chain. As Jared called it last week a Franken Chain. Unlike the monster this chain is nothing to be feared. If put together correctly there are many more miles that could be had. Since each chain has its own stretch it allows me to scientifically create chains to match the gearing I wish to run.


My most favorite tool in my toolbox. Yes, the elusive chain tool. This particular one is a Park CT-5. I have often thought about upgrading to a plier type chain tool such as the Park CT-2 but, hey the CT-5 works just fine for me.


Below is some of my handy work. Notice the two different chain colors. Yes this is a chain that has been spliced together. It has over 200 miles on it since its creation and no failures. I did have to shorten it due to some stretching after the first couple of rides. I have recently gone back to using the SRAM quick link system. This aides in the quickness of lengthenig and shortening of chains. It also puts less wear and tear on the pins from forceable removal with my CT-5.


Below are some chain pieces that some day I hope to put back together and make good links from so that they can be inserted and used as new pieces in new chains.


So in my retirement I started to wonder where this compulsion of cobbeling chains together come from. I was rather confused of where I learned this behavior until recently. I was at my parents house over the Thanksgiving weekend. While there they asked me to help put up the Christmas tree and the lights on the outside. All was going well until I was required to go and get the extension cord box. What I found next explained it all.

Below you see the plug end of a cord that was obviously made back in the 1920s


With a little bit of electrical tape and a newer brown extension cord.


You create a longer, better extension cord. Obviously the brown cord was not long enough to do the initial job so therefore the plug end needed to be surgically removed and added onto the 1920s cord to create one much longer UL approved extension cord.


Below we see an extension cord that obviously did not allow enough electrical items to be plugged into it. So, surgically remove the old end and add a newer better white end. What do you end up with? An extension cord that is much, much better than what you started with.


Like my chains, below you see cords that are hanging around just waiting to be made into new much better cords. If you look real hard you will notice that my father just dosen't mess around with 110 cords but he also delves into the world of 220 cords.


Below is a box of cords, plugs, and ends that are just waiting to be used or inherited by me.


I hope this view into the psyche of the Cooper mind will help you understand my compulsion with chains. If any of you would like to donate either old chains or boxes to my cause it would be greatly appreciated.

2012 Team Kits

Hello Hot Doggers.

The 2011 riding season is coming to a close. Visions of 2012 and that first sunny 70 degree day with dry singletrack are already dancing in our heads. It could be a long winter. So right the ship boys! There has been a lot of action on our FB page, and in keeping with that momentum, I release to you, our 2012 thd kit.

We will be going with Pactimo again for jerseys. We’re adding bib shorts, a wind jacket, and a cycling cap. We also have designs for a t-shirt, as well as an anodized and laser etched top cap that you can choose from multiple colors to match your trusty steed. For any of the cycling apparel items, we must hit a minimum of at least 5 items, or we can’t place the custom order for that piece. A price list of items can be found by clicking on their web site or by scrolling down. More details about each item can be found below.

** If you have any comments or suggestions on changing something you see, let me know, but please remember, I’ve tried to incorporate everyone’s feedback into all of this. It is impossible to please everyone, and this was the best I felt we could do, without losing any of the thd flair. Thank you all for your comments.

Without further adieu, here we go:

Short Sleeve Jersey - $63

Keeping with the same colors, and almost the same style. Subtle changes include smaller hot dogs on the front and back, some red piping, a wiener holding a beer and a hot dog on the back, and a new thd logo on the rear pocket. James, I inverted the colors for you, but it totally didn’t work or look as good as I wanted. I think this is our best look.

Long Sleeve Wind Jacket – Either $79 or $89

(depending on which jacket we go with) Pretty much the same as the jersey, with red and yellow all the way down the arms. Looks dope. Should protect us from the wind at Barry-Roubaix, Iceman, and outdoor drinking marathons.

Bib Shorts - $64

Totally new for 2012 and so much better than what we came up with in 2010. Same colors, in a more aggressive design with red piping and a wiener dude rocking his beer and hot dog snack. My personal favorite, is the phrase “ride bikes. drink beer” on the ass. Sorry James, we took it off the jersey, but too many peeps wanted it on the ass of shorts. I love it!

Cycling Cap - $14

Never had one of these guys before. I kept it simple, made sure it matched, and wasn’t overwhelming. Highlights include “Team hot dog” on both sides of the bill, a nice red with small yellow framing pinstripes over the top, and again “ride bikes. drink beer” on the back of the cap. Should look cool under our helmets.

T-Shirt – Around $8-$12 (depending on order amount and color selection)

Going black this time around…. With almost the same logo as the old shirts. Slightly different. Same fun. Rock it at your favorite cycling event. Just be warned, flocks of hot chicks may be coming your way! Nobs. If you guys want a color other than black, let me know. Will be ordering from All American Screen Printing once again. They did a fantastic job last year and were easy to work with.

Top Cap - $16

All new. We’ve never done this, and coach came up with the idea. This is our first stab at the design. “Team hot dog” at the top, with a wiener at the bottom. You can choose from a slew of colors, including: red, orange, blue, green, purple, aqua, gold, and metallic. We'll be ordering these from KustomCaps.

NEXT STEPS:

Please comment below on what you think, and what you plan on ordering. I’d like to get a count of how much and what. Whatever you tell me is what I will expect you are going with, so don’t put something down without standing behind it.

Fitting Party

I will then work with Pactimo on getting samples of everything in all sizes. Coach has been gracious enough to offer up his crib for everyone to come over and try the samples on and be comfortable with sizing. I assume Marco’s pizza, beer, and some shenanigans will be involved. Look for an invite soon.

Final Order Placement / Payment

Once we’re sized up, I’ll order everything. Pactimo actually emailed me today, asking if we were ordering anything for 2012... that being said, I may start working with their artist and getting sample sizes NEXT WEEK! Takes 5-6 weeks for almost everything to get in our possession. I’m hoping I can collect most of the money when placing the final order, cause they expect almost all of it paid up front. And it’s a going to be a hefty amount going on poor ol hd’s credit card. If we move, we could have everything in our possession before February even rolls around.

Right the Ship!

That’s right. Get the Doritos out of your mouth fatty. Barry-Roubaix is only 17.5 weeks away!

That’s it. Happy Thanksgiving. GO LIONS!

(can you figure out who finishes the tune at the end of this video?)

Bloomer Park CX Video

Slowly but surely, I am getting the hang of this camera editing software...Anybody know how to get royalty-free music so the RIAA doesn't come after me? Anyways, enjoy the video...play some of your own music alongside it!

Bloomer CX Race from Abbeytrails on Vimeo.

And some awesome Garmin Data for you all to enjoy!

- "Coach"

Random shots of historical weiners

Just a few pics I had on my phone and camera from Bloomer and Stony... Ill deal with the videos later...



Steve putting the hammer down...



JRAD climbing..



Steve hanging out on the beach...



I think the Rhino dude was trying to lick Santa pants in this one...



SANTA PANTS!!!!!



Steve with the quickeness..



The wiz. Nuff said.

Stomach of Anger, Lansing

My second Stomach of Anger event in only three races of my illustrious new career, and so far I prefer SofA courses, but Tailwind organization and enthusiasm, which is to say "noise." So a perfect day would be a fast course and lots of cowbells.

Anyhow, I had a frickin' awesome time today. Also painful. I'm still getting used to how painful these things are.

Met up with Gary Mudd, he of the C-class holeshot, and for the first time in my storied race career, I tried to get a proper warm-up in, having scoured the internets all week and cobbled together something that sounded good for just such a purpose, including "tempo" efforts with "stupid" and "death" surges. Three laps of course reconnaissance with Gary revealed a fast course, mostly hardpack with some muddy sections; twisty but nary a hill in sight. I dug it (see what I did there?).

Then I warmed up a bit more on the trainer during the first half of Gary's race, where he stole the holeshot with malice from those around him and proceeded to drag his field kicking and screaming through the first lap of his race.

When my race was up, I got close to the start line, but not right up front. Went hard into the first turn, but didn't kill myself getting there, ending up fifth, I think, out of maybe twelve. Maybe a third of the way through the first lap I passed a guy who seems to have blown himself up properly on the first sprint of the race, and then I think it was on the second lap, first turn, that this guy Jason McBride passed me with style on the inside of a hairpin little hill.

The whole rest of the race for me was basically a fight with Jason -- I passed him a lap later, and then I'd look back, having gapped him, only to see him right on my wheel later on. Rinse. Repeat. (Note to self: your dismounts suck. And you can't run. And you kinda can't ride too well half the time either.)

On lap three, I almost went down on this cambered, muddy turn, taking the inside really fast at a weird angle, but managed to slap a foot down and keep charging into more death and suffering. The last two laps were an anaerobic, crazy blur with Jason McBride breathing down my neck and this little blue alien "Sam" (who may or may not have been real) egging me on, all my concentration wavering between trying to put time into that crazy, persistent bastard (Jason, not the alien), and trying to just ride my own hard ride -- interestingly, the near-fall paid dividends in focus on laps four and five. Anyhow, it literally came down to the final straight: going through the last corner, I had a tiny bit of distance on Jason before the final straight, and halfway through it, my dumb ass looks back to see Jason overtaking me. I'm not sure if losing at the line was more the result of being straight cooked, or else being too concerned with the other guy: both were true (and, by the way, that guy earned it). But I literally stood up to sprint and the only thing that happened was great sadness and heartache.

I haven't seen the results yet, officially, but I heard I got fifth of maybe twelve, which I'm happy with (EXCEPT whenever I think of the fact that the first four places got SWAG from the event! I hoping it wasn't cool SWAG.) & by the way, the first three guys were. . . I almost said sandbaggers. What I meant was, those guys were fast!

Awesome day suffering. And beer. Thanks Michigan Brewery!

Good luck tomorrow at Bloomer, fellas.

I have no idea how to post videos or photos on a blog, but if doesn't show up here, you can check out Hot Dog's FB page for an exclusive (more or less) video by Gary Mudd of the day's festivities. You can even see me losing the fourth spot at the end:

Twas the Night Before Bloomer...

Twas the night before Bloomer and what do we have here?
Some Mexican Food from El Patio and A 4-Pack of Dogfish Head IPA Beer.
The spandex was packed in the bike bag with care,
In hopes that the end of the Cyclocross Season would soon be here.

Team Hot Dog was nestled all snug in their beds,
While visions of dismounting with the quickness danced in their heads;
And JRAD in his santa pants, and I with my cycling cap,
Can't wait for tomorrow morning, to feel like absolute CRAP.

Sleep tight, Hot Doggers! Winter's comin'

- Coach

Stony Creek Cyclocross

Matthew Stafford and the Lions are getting their tail feathers kicked right now, so I figured I would practice my blogging skills. Based on the last few hd blog posts, one would think we just sit around, watch people ride bikes, and drink beer. Not so fast. Some of us ride too, even after Iceman weekend is over. I'm just not one of them.

Sunday morning I decided to take the pup out for a morning hike on the single-track, then head over to the beach for some wiener action, cyclocross style. I'm glad I came out, Santa even took a break from his busy toy building schedule to demonstrate how he's still a whiz on the barriers (see video below).

Santa & Coach warming up

Steve looking like Fabio on the beach

Santa just doesn't visit the beach during his off-season

Brimming w/ joy

Pup looking on

Was nothing but dog on dog action at the end

Start of the B class. Shaun and his hangover are only 3 spots out of the lead here

I got a good whiff of Patron as Shaun flew by here

Shaun and his "I want my mommy" face

And last but not least, the mad cyclocross wiz is back, to demonstrate that fatherhood can't cause one to lose these sick sick skills:

I'm New and I'm Learning...

As if I didn't have enough crap dangling from my bike, I went and picked up a ContourHD Camera. To make things interesting, I decided to head out to the Tree Farm a few days after some rain, snow and wind. With a ton of trees down, slippery leaves and some strategical placed puddles, it made for a fun time. Anyways, this was what I captured from the ride...enjoy!



p.s. Sorry to bump your post down, HD!

Photoshop Fun

So I've been playing around alot with Photoshop lately, cause I've been hard at work coming up with our awesome 2012 kits. I decided to take a break, and create a little souvenir for myself from last weekend's Iceman. Iceman will always be my favorite race, and the reason I still bike/race. I think I will blow this up and maybe get it framed or something, but figured I'd share with all of hd nation.

Iceman - Behind the Scenes

Even though the Iceman Cometh is "Doneth", there's always a little bit of excitement once you get home and plug in the Digital Camera...Always some Blog-Worthy shots. Anyhow, I hope you enjoy these as much as I do!

I'm not sure what John is hiding underneath that tree branch, but Tom and Shaun appear to be less than impressed!


This photo must have been taken right after Shaun realized he didn't beat the 2:00:00 time, even though his garmin said he did!


This is going to be my new background on my computer. Who could resist a smile like that? Bonus points for represent'n the Michigan Brewing Company with that Fleece!


If you were wondering why Shaun wore his helmet in the car all the way up to Traverse City, he learned it from his father. Hot Dog is enjoying some Raging Bitch!
- Wheeeeeeee

Iceman Doneth

Race is over. We all made it. Course was best I've ever seen. Here are a few images of the fantastic day that was: